Today's a bit better than yesterday....

To kick things off, here's a video of Alex in front of the fan display at the store -- his expression is priceless:

Water balloons

Running through the sprinkler

Painting on the sidewalk

Sandbox

Playing with brother

As you can see, Alex has been very busy the past few days. It has been hot, hot, hot here, so he has been introduced to a lot of water play. He got into his first water balloon fight (thanks, Deb, for bringing those over!)—actually, five minutes’ worth of kids throwing water balloons on the ground to see them pop, but whatever. He “ran” through the sprinkler with me and the other kids. We made a water table for him to play in on the deck outside, and he spent more than an hour using a ladle to fling water across the deck. Our jealous two-year-old played alongside him, alternately helping him out and attempting to douse him with water. Yesterday he played in the sandbox again, with the hose dripping water from overhead. And he painted our front sidewalk (again with our two-year-old) using sidewalk paint made from corn starch and food coloring (thanks, Marcy!). He has been introduced to the joys of beating on pots and pans by his sister and brother. And, as always, he enjoys just hanging out on the couch flipping through his phone book.

We have seen some big changes in the week since we have been home. We’ve seen fewer tantrums and less crying overall, and less negative behavior in general. He seems to feel safe enough to relax. On several occasions he has complied with our directions (“Quieter!” “Gently!” “Give it to me,” etc.)—spoken in Russian. He is learning a few English words; our toddler has been happy to teach him “No!” Susan thinks he asked, “What is that?” in English yesterday—possibly mimicking our toddler. I think he may be learning to say “more” in English, but it’s hard to tell.

All of this is huge. Although we expect ups and downs in our adjustment to life together, overall things will only get better from here. We’re told by other adoptive families to expect 6-8 months to our “new normal.” It is going to be a long haul for all of us, but we’re off to a good start.

The paperwork blizzard continues…he needs to sign up for social security and medical insurance and on and on…and he has lots and lots of doctor appointments coming up, too. We are going to spend our summer at the doctor’s, I think. We’re learning more about his CP; without going into too much detail, it seems he might be able to walk—might—with some significant intervention. Obviously time will tell.

Our toddler is having a hard time adjusting. We left a very sweet, easy-to-handle two-year-old in May and came back to a little terror who cries at the drop of a hat and can’t figure out whether he wants to off this new kid or take care of him like he sees mom and dad do. It complicates things, for sure. The older kids have been hugely helpful.

We have also been getting tons of help and support from family and friends, nearby and far away. We have one friend who is actually staying with us for a couple days so we can do things like complete more paperwork and, um, unpack (yeah, we’re not even unpacked yet). Our days are kind of wall-to-wall busy, and we are trying to be good about getting enough sleep, so please forgive us if your kind note, gift, or meal hasn’t been acknowledged yet. All of your support has been helpful; your words of encouragement in particular have helped us pull through.

As for myself (Jerry), I am doing better than at the beginning of the week, for sure. I am now on a couple drugs to help with sleep and anxiety, and I have two decent nights’ worth of sleep under my belt. I think I was more exhausted from this trip than I knew, and more stressed out about the enormity of what we have taken on than I wanted to admit. As I get more sleep and rest, and as Alex demonstrates his resiliency and some trust in us, I think things will keep getting better. Not that they won’t still be hard—I dread the two or three weeks at the end of the summer when I will be home with all the kids by myself before school starts—but I think it will be a manageable hard, which isn’t a bad thing. No one ever was promised an easy life, and life is much, much harder for most people around the world.

Which reminds me…please pray for our fellow adoptive parent Lora, who just adopted a child (“Francine,” one of nine we had considered initially) a few months ago right before her husband was deployed to Afghanistan. Now her family has been evacuated from her home in Colorado Springs; the last we heard, she expected it to burn. She could use a break or two here.